How many industrial rubs before it becomes bobbly?

I have to  confess that on the Smugometer I was riding high. Made Christmas cake before my toe op last week. Never happened that early before. Alright, I did have a slight incident with the All Spice thinking it was the same as Mixed spice, but think I managed to dig most of it out of the flour. Looks good, smells good and I'm busy feeding it Brandy which is a heroic act of pure altruism in these alcohol-free days.
Wrapping up presents and it's not even Christmas eve! What is going on? Ah, yes, I'm retired. This is what retired people do. Immediate sense of Der flater mouse. I thought that for once in my life I was on top of my game, even with a broken but mending toe. But no. This is my game.

Never mind, suggested to son et lumiere that he might like to have an Ercol chair we gave them re-covered. They loved the Melin fabrics and enjoyed choosing from the samples I'd been sent. Choice made, I went back to the catalogue and found that the fabric they had chosen was from the upholstery fabric page.  Where was my fabric? Not on the upholstery page. Then I recalled my upholsterer saying that it had been a bit of a challenge because the fabric had been a bit stretchy. Thought nothing of it. On the upholstery page there are references to Teflon treatment and how many industrial rubs the upholstery fabric could withstand.

So we sit and look at our beautiful chaise and practise shouting at imaginary guests who will be real enough at Christmas,
"NOT ON THE CHAISE!"
Can't wait. (Smugometer reduced to zero.)

You can't have your cake and eat it.......