The day started well. Well, it did for my electrician. I gave him two kisses on the bottom.
Aha! Got your attention now. Yes, how the sparks flew.
You, my astute and selective readership, will know by now that this is not that sort of confessional..
I am referring to text etiquette, whereby you do not give your electrician, no matter how long you have known and trusted him with your inner circuitry, any kisses at all when you conclude a text. A full stop is all you need. Maybe a question mark? Or if you're feeling frisky, an exclamation mark at most.
I love texting, generally speaking. I got myself initiated in the art in a dank porta cabin that housed extras on Eastenders, many years ago. Time between scenes was filled with endless gossip and patient training of an older citizen as she grappled with her new mobile phone. If you recall, in those days, texting required endless clicking to obtain the right letter, and you also had the simultaneously helpful and infuriating predictive text.
I can remember returning home after depositing our son at university, and seeing he'd left a rucksack containing a few breakfast plates. He received a text from me, saying, "Just found your sucksack and slaves." I have improved enormously since then. As have mobile phones.
I like writing texts that are small post cards, and I love receiving them as long as War and Peace. I do not, however, like text-speak, Particularly from my contemporaries when I know they can write proper English with punctuation. So I am a self-confessed pedant which makes me my own worst critic when I get something wrong. Something I usually notice as I have just pressed send.
So I apologised to Richard, my electrician, for the kisses on the bottom. It seemed the right thing to do. I kept it short and businesslike.
I didn't explain that I don't even give Dearest two kisses on the bottom.
(Not unless he has been very very good.)
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