Michelin Star Dining in our Garden..

Oh, it's a blue-sky day and I am scrubbing our wee patio, out the back. Not the usual time of year for such a task? But my, you should see the layers of guano, or birdsht, as I like to call it.

Did I have you there for a moment? Not so much as a white and black blob from a passing pigeon. Not even the merest  flutter of wings in our garden. Dearest daughter has given us a pink suet heart to hang out, in addition to the tasteful peanut-holder purchased at Christmas.
"Birds go mad for this stuff, Mum," she said confidently, having researched the issue. Like I have not. Of course, all I could find was fatty balls which frankly, I drew the line at. It's a small garden and you'll think I'm snooty, but I will say it, nevertheless. We do not want to be dominated by fatty balls. I've made it one of life's guiding principles and I am unlikely to change now.

So the pale pink heart which comes with its own calorific content (Dear Lord, I now have to think about birds' waistlines as well as my own?)has been hung on the Acer which  is adjacent to the the peanut feeder.
Tasteful and tasty. Only refined birds with a well-defined sense of the aesthetic are invited. The rest can simply sod off.
Oh, that's not the right attitude at all.

Wearing my heart on my Acer..